Ok this is about as soap box as I get but it’s been on my mind for a while and I just can’t get past it….America, what happened? We are living to be offended, looking for the next thing we can sue for, trying to be discriminated against for the slightest thing.
I’m reading a new book “The Devine Commodity” by Skye Jethani. I’m only into the 2nd chapter but I’ve already found some great talking points. Here is the first one I came across that I wanted to share.
“One of the main problems is that in this chatty society, silence has become a very fearful thing. For most people, silence creates itchiness and nervousness” -Nouwen “As a result we’ve been conditioned to avoid silence at all cost less we be confronted with our own inner chaos. We manage to drown out the inner noise of our souls with the exterior noise of the world”-Skye’s commentary (Pg. 33-34)
While I realize this is most people these days, it really feels like this was written about me. I ALWAYS have something going on in the background, music, TV an audio, so does Mac. I will admit some of this is conscious distraction (when I run) but most of it is because I’m uncomfortable with silence. Why? Is there something wrong with silence? No, but a lot of people don’t like to get in their own heads and I’ve come to the conclusion in my own life that, that isn’t a good thing. How many time have I been asked my opinion, or asked why I have an opinion and not know the answer. Why do I get anxious about money things and have to be in control of them? Have I ever really taken the time to analyze that? No. Why not? Well I might have to address some things I don’t want to, and that is scary. That won’t happen if I keep my life noisy though.
When I run I purposefully distract myself so that I can ignore the little voice in my head saying, this is stupid just stop now. Am I missing the voice that says, Hey lady your tensing up your shoulders knock it off or ooh you calves hurt maybe you need to stretch them out after this run…am I risking injury? Yes.
So I’m taking baby steps to re-introduce silence into my life, starting with a run, 1 mile of silence then music. It went pretty well but I found my brain finding things to distract myself with anyway. Scouting out photo shoot locations for example, but I kept trying to reign it in and focus on my body and how it was feeling. My goal was simply not to injure myself as I start running again. Today I did another 2 mile run, with NO MUSIC. I increased my pace by 48 seconds per mile (I was pushing harder to be fair) but I was also paying attention. Yep my legs feel good I can keep going at this pace, ooh that is a headwind to worry if you slow down a bit, yikes my shoulders are up by my ears RELAX!
Now on to more serious matters…taking on my brain…maybe some silence in the car????
10 things I’m thankful for right now
My mom asked me yesterday what my plan was for my first run….I didn’t have one really I just wanted to lace up my shoes and get out the door, and that I did.
As soon as my feet hit the ground I was smiling, I didn’t know what to expect after 2 months off. My legs felt strong and my head instantly cleared, I was in the zone. I remembered why I run, not only for fitness but for sanity, to look around me and really take in the big world God created. Even though I live in the city I can see it in the trees, the sky and the river… even the other people on the trails. Its easy to get distracted by music or for me audio books but when I’m training I try to take at least 1 run a week with no headphones to really pay attention to what is around me and also to my body (to make sure nothing hurts,) and my form (to make sure I don’t hurt anything.)
The first 1/2 mile I thought I would be able to do a 5k, I probably could have, but then my brain kicked in and I realized that wouldn’t be smart. I need some time to make sure everything is working again. I caught myself tensing up my shoulders (an old bad habit) and started focusing on that. Next I need to make sure I’m in control of my pacing and then I’ll start building up my distance and speed again.
My current goal is just to get running again I have a 5k at the end of the month (that I signed up for before I knew I was pregnant.) After that speed training next season I’m going to work on 5 and 10k’s and speed!
So my non professional advice for coming back after some time off? Don’t be afraid to start running again, just start slow and monitor yourself.
I’m trying to live my life as green as my situation and priorities allow, however in this modern world its easy to fall into the convenience trap. However I’ve chosen not to get down on myself when it happens. I’ve seen a lot of negativity on some of the chat boards and Facebook groups I’m in when someone uses modern conveniences vs a greener product/method/food. Honestly I’m sick of it, I’m sick of all the negativity, I’m tired of hearing people say they are leaving a group after being attacked. Its just silly, we live in a modern world and short of moving out to the bush and living off the land, there is no getting away from that.
I don’t understand the point of exposing our kids to the chemicals in disposable diapers, but do I use them? Yes sometimes I do, and its ok, I make the best product choices I can (no bleach, less chemicals) and only use them when I have to (mainly with teething diaper rashes.) I prefer to take care of colds and other illnesses with oils and healthy eating habits, however sometimes it just doesn’t cut it and I go get an antibiotic or take some acetaminophen. We eat the best we can with as little processed foods as is reasonable for our life however we did eat out today at a fast food place and you know what its ok. I’ve even committed the cardinal sin a time or two of forgetting my cloth bags….and you know what? I wasn’t struck by lighting.
Why can’t we be supportive of each other? Why is a paper bag a reason to have 20 people attack you in a group? Why can’t we just all understand that living the perfect green life isn’t possible and that is ok? I
‘ve found that while the internet can be an amazing tool, it is also a great way for people to hide behind a made up identity or anonymous name and attack others. If we were kids this would be called bullying and there are a lot of anti-bullying campaigns going around. How come its ok for adults to bully but not kids? So what about my non green friends? I must have great ones because I’ve never gotten any flack for my choices from any of them.